Monday, April 5, 2010

E(xtremely) S(tupid) P(eople) N(etwork) and O(pening) D(ay)

I really hate to piss on the parade of cockeyed optimism even the most jaded fan (yrs truly) feels on Opening Day, but I just had to comment about the ESPN pre-game show last night.

What the fuck WAS it? In other words what, exactly, was THAT?

Is it just me, or did any of the rest of you wonder what in hell Dr. Dre, Lebron James and Mr. Whozzywhatsis Big Deal Record Exec were doing on the broadcast? Hyping their "Beats" headphones? I had to look at the channel to make sure the dog didn't accidentally hit something on the remote and flip the TV over to an informercial, fahcryinoutloud!

Look, I fully realize that ESPN has been somewhat unwatchable for a long time, like almost, forever, but last night really, really took the cake. What, exactly, do Dre, James and Mr. Who-zzy have to do with baseball, exactly? If anyone here has the answer, please speak up!

As if all that wasn't bad enough, what was also with the lovefest for No-MAH Garciaparra? Self-promotion and hype at its absolute worst...and for No-MAH to admit that he played in Fenway for, oh, what, eight years? and had never seen the inside of the Green Monster was a little...strange and off-putting, and a real metaphor for how much some of the modern player types care about the sport and its history, really. I mean, I don't know about you, but if I were fortunate enough to wear the uniform of a major league baseball team, playing in an historic venue such as Fenway, I'd be like a kid in candy store. *Sigh* But, I suppose, that's just me, and neither here nor there.

Anyway, Opening Day is here, finally. Despite myself, I actually am looking forward to listening to the game on the FAN today, since I can't watch it. As the New York Lottery is fond of saying, you never know, and as many have said throughout the years, hope springs eternal.

I did have one good laugh this morning on the way to work, though. And that was in listening to the parody of the wonderful Fogarty song "Centerfield," in which Al Dukes laments that "Jerry's our coach," and asks the question that eternally mystifies most Mets fans - "What did he" and goes even one further, asking "who will play, shortstop, and centerfield?"

Who will play, indeed? The mystery continues, but for today, it's Mets baseball! Batter up!


thomas said...

Glad to see some new posts here. I have been relegated to only the blogs that somehow my cpmpanies software has missed in it's prohibition of internet fun, and i like to have as many different points of view as i can, although they all seem to be nearly the same these days...But i have to ask...DINGO...DEB....Are these the people i think they may be?


Deb said...

I think they are; the real question is, are YOU who I think YOU are? Thomba? From the old

thomas said...

Tis I...Tis I.

Like i said, luckily the stupid filters here at work miss a lot of the


Deb said...

I hope all is well, Thomas. Anything new and exciting in your life you wish to share?

thomas said...

Uh...not really. May be moving back to Boston in August....go back to Architectural school, start my life over at

What's up with you guys?

Interesting, my little word verification is


thomas said...

So...I was wondering if i might do the GBU game rating for game two?

it would go a little something like this....

Piss Poor

After Maine somehow managed to hobble through five innings only giving up four runs and leave the game only down by three, you could just feel the foreboding as Jerry Manuel turned to Jennry "I'm only 20 and should be starting in AA" Mejia AKA Jennry "i was supposed to be eased into this in non-pressure situations" Mejia in the sixth, who promptly was hit pretty hard letting up amazingly just one run. Next in the seventh Jerry turns to Sean "how'd i even make this team and cost the mets a better pitcher in the first place" Green, who gives up yet another run. And then comes the bottom of the seventh, it's at this point the Mets and their fans start thinking about the thank you cards they'll have to send the Marlins BP and fielders for letting them back in this game. But wait, Down just three with two outs, bases loaded and None other than David Wright at the plate, the mets coaching staff once again decide to strike, using the always fleet footed Fernando Tatis (sarcasm!) as their wepon of mass detruction, unsuccessfully trying to score on a passed ball that managed to get about a foot away from the catcher (slight exageration for emphasis), thus taking the bat, and the game out of your best hitters hands.

Then come the bright spots of the Mets pitching, as Feliciano shut the Marlins down in the eighth and the Marlins managed to finish the job of handing the game back to the Mets in the Bottom half. Krod pitched a shut down ninth, and Mets fans were starting to believe once again.

Then in the ninth with two outs, wright on first and the newest bright spot of the Mets Jason Bay at the plate, the coching staff strikes again, doing the unthinkable, sending wright.

Let's pause for a minute to review this decision, which every arm-chair manager and their best friends (yes i mean fido) thought was a no-brainer...

Downside? Wright is thrown out, inning over, once again taking the bat and thus the game out of the hands of one of your best hitters. Upside? Wright steals the base, and as would happen, Bay is walked, still taking the bat and thus the game out of the hands of one of your best hitters.

Well, apparently Fido is smarter than Jerry and Razor "i've lost my" Shines afterall.

As fate would have it, that would be the end of the possible comeback for the mets, as foregoing Nieve, Manuel brings in Hisanori "i've never thrown a major league pitch" Takahashi, who promptly gives up the game winning run.

sidenote...Manuel did bring in Nieve to get them outta the inning with no further damage so that the bottom of our lineup could have one last shot at the Marlins pen...but alas, we just didn't have the firepower down there.

Recap...deserving or not we might've won this game had the caoching staff used, Nieve, Pedro, and Krod before going to the others and had they allowed our big bats an opportunity to actually come through.

In one word, from this fan...disgusted!

Deb said...

Very interesting, Thomas. I have to say I fell asleep before all the good stuff started, but did see Jenrry "Don't Ask Me Why I Just Can't Spell it 'Henry'" Mejia get hit pretty hard. At that point, I think it was 5-1 or 6-1, and frankly, I was too tired to consider even watching anymore.

Frankly, pondering why Jenrry spells his name that way was the most interesting part of the game.... lol.